When we get honest with ourselves and admit it, there is even something wrong with a pleasant moment. It won’t last!
So, how often do your thoughts run along something like these:
I wish it was Friday…..…or next week.
I wish I was done with this job.
I wish ………….………..…….(fill in the blank) would call.
I wish it wasn’t so hot/cold.
I wish …………….………..….(fill in the blank) loved me.
I wish I felt better.
I wish I had a new car/home.
This traffic is awful.
I wish it was morning.
I wish that check would come.
I wish my children would…………………………………(fill in the blank)
I wish my neighbor would……………………………….(fill in the blank)
The list goes on and on.
Something is just not quite right. And we spend time grumbling about it, feeling unfulfilled.
Living from an “If only” state is very unsatisfying way to live.
Thinking that things shouldn’t be the way they are is a waste of energy and keeps us stuck.
“We can’t unplant the apple seed of the apple we’re holding in our hand.” (Dzogchen Ponlop in Rebel Buddha)
This moment is the “apple” that has grown and like it or not, we are eating it. It is a result of seeds that have been planted, of causes and conditions that have grown into just what is right now.
So, why argue with it? We can’t undo what has been done. It has come to pass.
What we can do is to plant new seeds in this moment.
Every moment our thoughts, feelings and deeds are seeds that will grow into life conditions and circumstances which will become our experience.
This is also called karma.
So we can use this moment for what it is intended for. We can shift our thoughts into alignment with our true desires, liberty, freedom, and the ability to enjoy and create.
Better to ask what is needed in this moment. What can we think and do right now that will cause no harm and relieve suffering?
What could bring more ease into this moment, the one we are living right now that does not involve a distraction?
Acceptance of what is this moment always relieves suffering.
However we feel right now is what is ours to work with. It has come to pass. It is the “apple” in our hand. These feelings are not our enemy. They have come to help us see our patterns of thought and our deeper motives.
We create. This is our nature. Our thoughts, deeds and energies create. Something helpful we can always do is to appreciate this amazing human capacity!
I invite you to be with what is here now without blaming or judging it wrong. It is here to do something with, to make something from.
If there is sadness then this is a time for weeping. If there is joy, then rejoice!
But let’s stop wasting our energy grumbling about what has come to pass. It only creates more of the same.
What is it that we won’t/can’t accept right now?
Our non-acceptance won’t make it go away, but learning to ask pertinent questions begins the transformation process.
The seeds have ripened, and this moment is a result of all that has preceded it. It couldn’t be any other way.
As I sit down with myself when I get upset, and ask what is it that I am having difficulty accepting, I begin to uncover the fears that were seeded in my life.
Fear of loss? Fear of pain? Feelings of embarrassment? Whatever they are I need to bring them into my awareness. Now. Yes, now, this moment.
I open to them as they arise, handling each by just sitting with it and allowing myself to breathe with it.
As I do this, I find myself stepping away from the story that surrounds the feeling. The content is not the important issue. Getting involved with the story is just another distraction.
The content and is not as vital we might think.
Once we’ve heard the story do we really need to listen to it again? How many times have we already heard it?
Even our friends have probably gotten bored with it.
The story can be reframed but will we really believe it? In time something will also be wrong with the new one. Instead, why not go for transformation?
Hurtful emotions can be transformed and then a true feeling of satisfaction arise. Life will get so much easier!
The field of neuroscience has found that negative emotions last only approximately 30 or 45 seconds at most—unless they are recreated by retelling the story! And then they can go on and on, recharged by every retelling of the event.
When we can face the emotion directly, be present with it, sit with it and step away from the content (the story) the emotion will dissolve. It can’t last for nothing, absolutely nothing, is permanent.
When we can be at peace with this truth, life really transforms!
Then we begin to develop equanimity, the understanding that this minute is just what it is, and it can’t be removed, try as we might to push it away.
This moment needs to be lived through acceptance, and the way we treat this moment has consequences. And it doesn’t last!
This is a process. But I can’t think of much better use of the present moment than to relieve suffering and engage in the wisdom that presents itself as our mind becomes more calm and spacious.
This process is creation. You are a creator! There’s nothing wrong with this moment. It’s here for a great purpose. Use it.