Who would have thought? We usually assume protection is the best defense against the pain of betrayal, but not so. It just causes more grief.
We all will take our turns both at being betrayed and betraying others. Therefore, it’s essential to learn how to meet them.
Breaking open, becoming vulnerable, deeply honest about our illusions and delusions leads us into grace and real joy.
In actuality betrayal is a catalyst for something powerful to happen. It is an opening for healing, though it seems anything but.
At these times we need to go within and find out what our expectations in this matter were/are. And this honesty won’t be comfortable—just necessary.
This is breaking open—to ourselves and to the truth of what we are really feeling and thinking.
Life requires investigation and openness, not stronger walls.
What precepts and beliefs have we been living by? Where are our sore spots? We need to experience the closed off places, where we have felt abandoned, hurt and shamed.
Within every betrayal we will find little dark pockets of shame, wounded places in the heart that we have tried to hide, from ourselves and others.
It is in these “protected places” that our real light is hidden, and how light desires to shine! Light cannot remain hidden in darkness. So, the light creates many opportunities. We call them “betrayals."
Hidden within these experiences we will find our real gifts that no longer want to stay encased within our walls of self-protection under which lie our hidden demands.
But help is seeking us! That which we seek is within us.
When we let the cracks that betrayal causes show (what we call imperfections) and admit that we really don’t “have it all together” or we wouldn’t have demanded certain behaviors in ourselves or others.
We don’t have to be this “perfect me” that we had hoped we could achieve. We look for the delusions in our beliefs.
Who did we think we were anyway? Perhaps a little humor and humility might reveal new strength. We are not that perfect person we hoped we were, and tried to be. No, we are much, much more.
Perfection is not the goal. Being real is our true value. Let the cracks in our armor show; they reveal our hidden light.
As Dr. Jung has said, “We all walk in shoes too small for us.”
We might investigate our fears. Who will we be if we lose………………………….? (fill in the blank)
What will become of us? As fears are brought out into the light solutions reveal themselves.
What are we protecting ourselves from and why do we need it?
As we breathe through all these emotions we find we are still here! What have we really lost? Except illusions.
Scott Peck says becoming disillusioned is a very good thing because each illusion we lose brings us closer to the truth.
So, here we are, standing on the very “ground of being” which can never be lost.
Here is where new beginnings take place.
In this moment what new strength do you feel inside? And deep down in your heart what do you really desire?
I recommend putting all this in your journal. Keep writing until you feel a lifting of the spirit. It will come.
Or talk this out with your inner child. The wisdom within you supports that which you truly are.
Humility comes by letting go of the arrogance that thinks opinions are truth, valid. These cherished opinions are not so “holy” as we had thought. Especially the ones we have about ourselves.
We always have choices. Do we want to remain strong and pretend we are all knowing? That whatever took place shouldn’t have happened?
Einstein said the most important question to ask is, “Is this a friendly universe?”
How would it be to just connect with the joy of the loving energy that is here, holding everything together, loving us and helping us into our future?
Perhaps we need to place our expectations, our hopes, our faith upon Divine Universal Energy that always gives us just what is needed.
This is the lesson Job learned.
Job is a symbol of “everyman.” Job felt betrayed by God and through much probing discovered it was his way of seeing that caused his suffering.
When Job finally became vulnerable and admitted his anger and resentment, he heard the voice of God.
Job then realized he couldn’t control things, as he wasn’t as wise as he had imagined.
So Job surrendered to this greater power, Divine Universal Energy, that knew how to become.
Job realized that he didn’t know how to direct the world. He let the cracks in his armor show and dropped the illusion that he knew what should happen. What a revelation!
Through his betrayals and suffering Job was transformed into new and greater life. So it is with us!
As we trust Universal Energy to work things out we feel a sense of peace that truly heals our hearts.
As long as we live in these bodies we will have losses, disappointments and betrayals to work through.
So when we feel the wrenching pain of betrayal, let’s resist the impulse to close down, blame ourselves and others. Quick answers that aren’t deeply investigated don’t really solve anything.
I suggest we get on with it. Licking our wounds only works for a time. Perhaps now is the time to sit in the not-knowing, trusting the flow of the universe to birth something new.
It will come and will surprise us by its preciousness and beauty.
And our healing blesses many. For what touches one life touches all, due to the Oneness of all things.
There is surely enough betrayal around to awaken and light up the entire world.
Let’s not leave this energy unused!
In tenderness and love, Rev. Billie